Memory
by scarlet phlame
Summary: She can't remember his name. (part two of 'stars entangled in the brightest constellations)


_Don't forget me_

_I won't forget you_

_You know it's ending_

_But I'll come for you_

-stars-

_She doesn't remember his name anymore._

_She squeezes his hand everywhere they go. Writes notes down in her sticky note book. Takes pictures and writes about him, writes, just writes. She never, ever, ever lets go of his hand._

_She's afraid she'll lose him if she lets go. She's afraid she'll forget._

_She never wants to forget._

_And she's still forgetting, more and more, with every passing day._

_Rose walks into the kitchen on one Monday. Sees him standing by the table, reading a magazine._

_She screams and drops her book. Falls to the floor and starts crying. He's nothing more to her than a stranger, standing in her house. She doesn't remember who he is to her anymore._

_But he's still there for her. Even when she's sobbing on the floor, he openly takes her into his arms, and they sit there, for hours and hours, before it becomes apparent to them that this isn't something they can run away from, like they can run away from everything else._

_The Doctor can't be a doctor for her, now._

_He takes her to the hospital._

_They run scans upon scans and find a brain tumor._

_But she can't survive the surgery._

_Rose Tyler has thirty days left to live._

-stars-

The Doctor tries to help her remember.

He really does. He re-introduces her to all the friends she forgets. He takes her on walks around the park when she forgets what trees are. When they almost get separated on one, he takes her home and makes her a giant book covered with sticky notes on who everyone is.

She forgets Jackie and Pete and Tony, after a while.

So he takes her to their grave.

She doesn't cry. Rose Tyler doesn't know who they are. Not anymore. They are nothing to her but empty names, scattered across space. Words that once meant something but are nothing.

Then she forgets him.

He's not sure which is harder. Watching her forget everything and everyone she once knew, or watching her walk in and _scream_ at the sight of a stranger in her house.

He tries not to think about it.

But he does anyway.

-stars-

_Jackie, Pete, and Tony are dead._

_Rose likes to think they went peacefully, though there was no proof of this in their final, somber, sad expressions._

_They all died, all at once, in a fire. Sometimes Rose wishes she'd died with them too. Sometimes, she's glad to be alive. Most of the time, she doesn't know._

_The Doctor tries not to mention it. Always running away when the situation gets difficult. Always pretending nothing ever happened._

_So she tries to pretend too, but it feels more bitter than trying to remember._

_The Doctor is almost relieved when she forgets._

_Sometimes, though, he catches her whispering their names in her sleep. Sometimes shouting. Sometimes, he already knows what she's thinking about._

_Sometimes, it's him whispering names. Names he doesn't know. Names like 'Amy, Rory, Clara, Clara, Clara'. Names that probably were once important to him, or should be important to the man he would have become._

_Sometimes, the Doctor can't tell the difference between him and Rose._

-stars-

On the 10th day, Rose is positive she needs to go to the countryside. Alone. Without the Doctor.

He tells her no every day. Tells her she can't, because if she does, she won't be able to take care of herself.

She still insists.

-stars-

By the 15th day, the Doctor finds himself reminding her who he is for the rest of the days to come, every single morning, afternoon, and night.

She asks to go to the countryside alone. He reminds her every day she can't.

-stars-

On the 17th day, Rose says she wants the Doctor. The real Doctor. The one she travelled with.

He goes to her.

She says he isn't the Doctor.

He knows he isn't. But he stays, anyway.

-stars-

On the 20th day, Rose forgets her name.

He reminds her, knowing she'll forget soon again, anyway.

-stars-

–––

-stars-

"Hello," Rose says, to the strangest stranger in the room on one of the days (she forgets which it is).

"Hello," the Doctor says back. "How are you feeling?"

"Great," she tells him. "Fantastic. Molto bene. B- b-..."

He raises an eyebrow.

"B-b- b," she stutters.

"Go on," he encourages her, with that sad darkness filling his expressions. "Go on."

"Brilliant," she finishes, staring at him, breathless. "Sorry. Meant t- to say brilliant." she forces on a smile. That beautiful smile.

The Doctor can't smile back at her.

-stars-

Rose asks to go to the countryside.

-stars-

On the 27th day, the Doctor drives her to the countryside.

She doesn't do much. Just looks out the window for a few minutes. Minutes into hours.

Then she tells him to turn around and drive them back home.

-stars-

On the 29th day, the Doctor tells her she will die tomorrow.

He doesn't need to tell her. Her life is the only thing she forgets. Her death is the only thing she remembers.

-stars-

On the 30th day, Rose Tyler's eyes close for the last time.

They bury her a few days later in the countryside, next to the grave of her parents and her little brother.

Her eyes are closed, but she doesn't look peaceful.

She does look beautiful in the casket, yellow hair billowing out behind her like a curtain. Lying in a bed of red satin. Scarlet roses.

He thinks of the dress she wore once.

The Doctor doesn't watch as she's lowered into the ground.

-stars-

_Journal Entry #456_

_Today, we buried Rose._

_I'd like to think that she went peacefully._

-stars-

* * *

**_AN: A while back, my aunty got diagnosed with Alzheimer's, and she just recently died. So... there we are, then. Sorry if this made you sad. -_-_**


End file.
